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trekkie
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PostPosted: Thu Jul 19, 2007 5:17 pm  Post subject:  10 things i hate about star trek Reply with quoteBottom of PageBack to top

10. Noisy doors.
You can't walk three feet in a starship without some door whooshing or screeching at you. My office building has automatic sliding doors. They're dead silent. If those doors went "wheet!" every time a person walked through them, about once a month some guy in accounting would snap and go on a shooting rampage. Sorry Scotty, the IEEE has revoked your membership until you learn to master WD-40


9. The Federation.
This organization creeps me out. A planet-wide government that runs everything, and that has abolished money. A veritable planetary DMV. Oh sure, it looks like a cool place when you're rocketing around in a Federation Starship, but I wonder how the guy driving a Federation dump truck feels about it?


And everyone has to wear those spandex uniforms. Here's an important fact: Most people, you don't want to see them in spandex. You'd pay good money to not have to see them. If money hadn't been abolished, that is. So you're screwed.


8. Reversing the Polarity.
For cripes sake Giordi, stop reversing the polarity of everything! It might work once in a while, but usually it just screws things up. I have it on good authority that the technicians at Starbase 12 HATE that. Every time the Enterprise comes in for its 10,000 hour checkup, they've gotta go through the whole damned ship fixing stuff. "What happened to the toilet in Stateroom 3?" "Well, the plumbing backed up, and Giordi thought he could fix it by reversing the polarity."


Between Scotty's poor lubrication habits and Geordi's damned polarity reversing trick, it's a wonder the Enterprise doesn't just spontaneously explode whenever they put the juice to it.


7. Seatbelts.
Yeah, I know this one is overdone, but you'd think that the first time an explosion caused the guy at the nav station to fly over the captain's head with a good 8 feet of clearance, someone would say, "You know, we might think of inventing some furutistic restraining device to prevent that from happening." So of course, they did make something like that for the second Enterprise (the first one blew up due to poor lubrication), but what was it? A hard plastic thing that's locked over your thighs. Oh, I'll bet THAT feels good in the corners. "Hey look! The leg-bars worked as advertised! There goes Kirk's torso!"


6. No fuses.
Every time there's a power surge on the Enterprise the various stations and consoles explode in a shower of sparks and throw their seatbelt-less operators over Picard's head. If we could get Giordi to stop reversing the polarity for a minute, we could get him to go shopping at the nearest Starship parts store and pick up a few fuses. And while he's shopping, he could stop at an intergalactic IKEA and pick up a few chairs for the bridge personnel. If you're going to put me in front of a fuseless exploding console all day, the least you could do is let me sit down.



5. Rule by committee.
Here's the difference between Star Trek and the best SF show on TV last year:

Star Trek:

Picard: "Arm photon torpedoes!"
Riker: "Captain! Are you sure that's wise?"
Troi: "Captain! I'm picking up conflicting feelings about this! And, it appears that you're a 'fraidy cat."
Wesley: "Captain, I'm just an annoying punk, but I thought I should say something."
Worf: "Captain, can I push the button? This is giving me a big Klingon warrior chubby."
Giordi: "Captain, I think we should reverse the polarity on them first."
Picard: "I'm so confused. I'm going to go to my stateroom and look
pensive."


Firefly:

Captain: "Let's shoot them."
Crewman: "Are you sure that's wise?"
Captain: "Do you know what the chain of command is? It's the chain I'll BEAT YOU WITH until you realize who's in command."
Crewman: "Aye Aye, sir!"


4. A Star Trek quiz:
Kirk, Spock, McCoy, and 'Ensign Gomez' beam down to a planet. Which one isn't coming back?


3. Technobabble.
The other night, I couldn't get my car to start. I solved the problem by reversing the polarity of the car battery, and routing the power through my satellite dish. The resulting subspace plasma caused a rift in the space-time continuum, which created a quantum tunnelling effect that charged the protons in the engine core, thus starting my car. Child's play, really. As a happy side-effect, I also now get the Spice Channel for free.


2. The Holodeck.
I mean, it's cool and all. But do you really believe that people would use it to re-create Sherlock Holmes mysteries and old-west saloons? Come on, we all know what the holodeck would be used for. And we also know what the worst job on the Enterprise would be: Having to squeegie the holodeck clean.


1. The Prime Directive.
How stupid is this? Remember when Marvin the Martian was going to blow up the Earth, because it obstructed his view of Venus? And how Bugs Bunny stopped him by stealing the Illudium Q36 Space Modulator? Well, in the Star Trek universe, Bugs would be doing time. Probably in a room filled with Roseanne lookalikes wearing spandex uniforms, walking through doors going WHEET! all day. It would be heck. At least until the Kaboom. The Earth-shattering Kaboom.

 

 

  
jim
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Age: 68
Joined: 10 Feb 2007
Posts: 94

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PostPosted: Thu Jul 19, 2007 8:15 pm  Post subject:  (No subject) Reply with quoteBottom of PageBack to top

Its awesome that Spock actually in real life is a classy nude photographer as a hobby. Here is the link:


Spocks Pics

 

 



Last edited by jim on Sun Nov 25, 2007 12:11 pm; edited 1 time in total

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TMS
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PostPosted: Sat Jul 21, 2007 11:24 am  Post subject:  Brilliant Reply with quoteBottom of PageBack to top

Trekkie, a brilliant post. LOL. I found it through a link on DIGG. Thanks for making my day.

 

 

  
DekklinOfDeath
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PostPosted: Sat Jul 21, 2007 12:55 pm  Post subject:  Re: 10 things i hate about star trek Reply with quoteBottom of PageBack to top

trekkie wrote:

3. Technobabble.
The other night, I couldn't get my car to start. I solved the problem by reversing the polarity of the car battery, and routing the power through my satellite dish. The resulting subspace plasma caused a rift in the space-time continuum, which created a quantum tunnelling effect that charged the protons in the engine core, thus starting my car. Child's play, really. As a happy side-effect, I also now get the Spice Channel for free.


I believe the proper term is Trek-nobabble (possibly without the hyphen).

You could have also fixed your car by using a Temporal Phase Shifted Modulating Inverse Tachyon Beam, while rerouting power through the main deflector dish.

 

 

  
asd
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PostPosted: Sat Jul 21, 2007 5:29 pm  Post subject:  asd Reply with quoteBottom of PageBack to top

You know what I hate about star trek? Retards like you who think they are funny.

 

 

  
Tenth Speed Writer
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PostPosted: Sun Jul 22, 2007 9:45 am  Post subject:  Re: asd Reply with quoteBottom of PageBack to top

asd wrote:
You know what I hate about star trek? Retards like you who think they are funny.


Y'know what I love about Star Trek?

Fannubs like you who don't realize they're the only ones taking offense to someone mocking a TV series. :]

 

 

  
no.
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PostPosted: Sun Jul 22, 2007 2:59 pm  Post subject:  (No subject) Reply with quoteBottom of PageBack to top

hey trekkie, you're a frigging moron. now get out.

 

 

  
ballbuster
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PostPosted: Sun Jul 22, 2007 6:25 pm  Post subject: Oh yes ! hmm Reply with quoteBottom of PageBack to top

no. wrote:
hey trekkie, you're a frigging moron. now get out.


yea...um...trekkie's not the moron, the guy who thinks going onto the internet and trying to push people around makes him more of a man or somehow tough is the moron.

Little boy, turn off the computer and walk away. You wanna be a man, go to a bar and call the bouncer a frigging moron. Maybe then you'll understand what a bitch you are.

funny post trekkie, that actually explained by this little boy doesn't like star trek. too bad, he's too much of a frigging moron to realize it

 

 

  
Zeropoint
Guest






PostPosted: Sun Jul 22, 2007 6:29 pm  Post subject:  trek Reply with quoteBottom of PageBack to top

This one actually made it over to the startrek.com forum

We liked it. Smile

 

 

  
yes
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PostPosted: Sun Jul 22, 2007 6:39 pm  Post subject:  stfu Reply with quoteBottom of PageBack to top

no. wrote:
hey trekkie, you're a frigging moron. now get out.


hey no. stfu. yes.

 

 

  
Xeno
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PostPosted: Mon Jul 23, 2007 2:04 am  Post subject:  (No subject) Reply with quoteBottom of PageBack to top

pretty funny post, and i really don't see even hardcore trek fans taking offense from this, pretty sure they've all observed the various quirks of trek at some point.
doesn't take away from the innovation the series brought for it's time.

on a followup rant, i started watching stargate atlantis not long ago, and guess what, the doors on the city built by the "infinitely advanced alien race that evolved to become godlike energy" need you to swipe your hand in front of a 3-foot long motion detector to open them, and guess what, they SWOOOOSHHH

 

 

  
JFStan
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PostPosted: Mon Jul 23, 2007 6:32 am  Post subject:  (No subject) Reply with quoteBottom of PageBack to top

I'm one of the biggest Trekkie/Trekkers ion the galaxy, and I thought this was hilarious. Those of you who can't take a joke, lighten up.

You forgot one thing about the Holodeck: You'd think they would have dismantled and maybe redesigned the thing, since nearly every time they activated it the ship almost got destroyed or some crew members nearly died.

And better yet, what if the "Holodeck takes over the ship" scenario had occured during the situation mentioned in the original post? Terminal embarrisment. Smile

 

 

  
brewman
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PostPosted: Mon Jul 23, 2007 2:15 pm  Post subject:  something you forgot Reply with quoteBottom of PageBack to top

for number three, you forgot to say something about fluctuation...things are always fluctuating in Star Trek.

 

 

  
Ham Salad
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PostPosted: Mon Jul 23, 2007 10:58 pm  Post subject:  Worst things about star trek? Reply with quoteBottom of PageBack to top

Well, the worst SF show on TV is firefly...and the fact it died after 6 episodes while trek has been ongoing since 1967 might clue you in a bit.
I have to believe that there are firefly fans just like I have to believe there are fans of lost in space...but m,y suspician is they both are riding the same short bus.

Now, the problem here is that you can't find just 10 things wrong with firefly...in fact, you can't find less than 10 things wrong with firefly per minute.

How about:

1. idiotic western in space.
It's been done befoire, and it sucked every time it was tried.

2. George lucas called, he says your han solo ripoff is lame.

3. Reavers. right, insane people who can nonethelss fly spacecraft.
Riggghhhttt. This is almost like idiots using computers...

oh, wait: you do . never mind.

4. Guns that throw bullets far in the future.

Oh, sure, I believe they would still be using 200 year old weapons designs...look at all the f-18 pilots that wear a flintlock.

idiotic.

5. Cornball corn pone accents.
The old west was 150 years ago, and it's just as likely that
in the future they would talk and dress like disco stu as a friggin' cowboy.

6. FTL travel or not? make up your tiny little minds.


I've got to stop, just thinking about that atrocity firefly is making me ill.

 

 

  
Dark_Side
Guest






PostPosted: Tue Jul 24, 2007 10:05 am  Post subject:  Re: Worst things about star trek? Reply with quoteBottom of PageBack to top

Ham Salad wrote:

I have to believe that there are firefly fans just like I have to believe there are fans of lost in space...but m,y suspician is they both are riding the same short bus.

I've got to stop, just thinking about that atrocity firefly is making me ill.


you seem to be neglecting half the name, science FICTION. It's not about realism, it's about telling a story in a different way. Who cares if it's not realistic? It tells a good story.
Freakin star trek is about as likely to happen as you getting laid. As for the short bus, I'm sure you're well acquainted with it

 

 

  
Guest







PostPosted: Tue Jul 24, 2007 12:25 pm  Post subject:  Re: Worst things about star trek? Reply with quoteBottom of PageBack to top

Dark_Side wrote:
Ham Salad wrote:

I have to believe that there are firefly fans just like I have to believe there are fans of lost in space...but m,y suspician is they both are riding the same short bus.

I've got to stop, just thinking about that atrocity firefly is making me ill.


you seem to be neglecting half the name, science FICTION.


No, you're forgetting about the SCIENCE part.

Firefly isn'tsciencfiction, it's a bad fantasy...and it sucks.


Dark_Side wrote:


It's not about realism,



That describes your point of view, yes.


Dark_Side wrote:

it's about telling a story in a different way. Who cares if it's not realistic? It tells a good story.




Yes, it does tell a story in a different way: it tells a stupid story in a bad way.

No, actually it doesn't. firefly fails in every way, and the story is stupid, unrealistic andfull of holes as the heads of it's fans.

I mean,I don't want to be harlan ellison here, but you clearly can't tell the difference between good and bad.

Dark_Side wrote:

Freakin star trek is about as likely to happen as you getting laid.


You mean it happens three times a week.

Well, I'm not so sure that trek is a likely as that, but it'sstill better than firefly in every way.

[quote="Dark_Side"
As for the short bus, I'm sure you're well acquainted with it[/quote]

Sure, I'm aware you ride it.

 

 

  
Reece
Guest






PostPosted: Tue Jul 24, 2007 12:57 pm  Post subject:  Science + Fiction Reply with quoteBottom of PageBack to top

You got your Science in my fiction!
No, you got your fiction on my Science!

anyway, great original post. I'm amazed it took that long to get nasty.

 

 

  
Ham salad
Guest






PostPosted: Tue Jul 24, 2007 1:21 pm  Post subject:  Re: Science + Fiction Reply with quoteBottom of PageBack to top

Reece wrote:
You got your Science in my fiction!
No, you got your fiction on my Science!

anyway, great original post. I'm amazed it took that long to get nasty.


Firefly makes life nasty.

No, my bitchslap of firefly is no less or more nastly than that rather simple minded whine about unimportant dramtic license aspects of Trek.
The differnce is, firefly really DOES stink.

Seriously, you can't criticise something and then plug something else which is far worse: it tends to weaken your critical position.

Star Trek isn't perfect, and if you want to compare it to the Prisoner it's going to make it look even less perfect; but comparing it to FIREFLY?
That just makes you look like an idiot.

 

 

  
Hagbard
Guest






PostPosted: Tue Jul 24, 2007 5:01 pm  Post subject:  Re: Worst things about star trek? Reply with quoteBottom of PageBack to top

Ham Salad wrote:
Well, the worst SF show on TV is firefly...and the fact it died after 6 episodes while trek has been ongoing since 1967 might clue you in a bit.
I have to believe that there are firefly fans just like I have to believe there are fans of lost in space...but m,y suspician is they both are riding the same short bus.

Now, the problem here is that you can't find just 10 things wrong with firefly...in fact, you can't find less than 10 things wrong with firefly per minute.

How about:

1. idiotic western in space.
It's been done befoire, and it sucked every time it was tried.


Don't really see how that supports your argument that Firefly itself is bad. Unless you're saying you don't like the genre iteself, but that still doesn't reflect on the qualities of the show itself.

Score on making a valid point: 0.

Quote:
2. George lucas called, he says your han solo ripoff is lame.


Yeah, and Han Solo was sooooo original. Didn't you hear about Philip Francis Nowlan's call to Lucas? Yeah, apparently Lucas had this idea of a Buck Roger's knockoff who gallivanted around the galaxy with a sasquatch instead of a woman.

Score on making a valid point: 0.

Quote:
3. Reavers. right, insane people who can nonethelss fly spacecraft.
Riggghhhttt.


And Murdock from the A-team was an insane guy who was a crack chopper pilot in the Vietnam war and was always flying various civilian craft during the series. How exactly is insanity related to hand-eye coordination?

Score on making a valid point: 0.

Quote:
This is almost like idiots using computers...

oh, wait: you do . never mind.


Oooh a lame joke. I should subtract points for that.

Quote:
4. Guns that throw bullets far in the future.

Oh, sure, I believe they would still be using 200 year old weapons designs...look at all the f-18 pilots that wear a flintlock.

idiotic.


Well, if you knew anything about the universe of the series, you'd know that advanced weaponry exists. However, it is 1) very expensive and 2) very regulated by the Alliance. In fact, the Alliance regulates all technology. There are those who don't want to be on the Alliance radar for various reasons stemming from being wanted by the law to just been against what the Alliance stands for. A slug thrower is cheap, easy to get, and does not require a permit.

Score on making a valid point: 0.

Quote:
5. Cornball corn pone accents.
The old west was 150 years ago, and it's just as likely that
in the future they would talk and dress like disco stu as a friggin' cowboy.


Although the accent thing comes down to a matter of opinion, I'll give you that one. However, the manner of dress of those outside the alliance control is again an issue of available technology. The Alliance has very little influence or infiltration in the planets at the Rim. They wear what's available. And some even wear it as a sense of pride in their opposition toward the militaristic alliance. Those who live in under the Alliance's wing wear clothes that one would expect in a futuristic sci-fi setting.

Score on making a valid point: 0.5 for the accent.


Quote:
6. FTL travel or not? make up your tiny little minds.


Where do they ever go faster than light? There are two types of drives on the ship: reaction drives and pulse drives. Reaction drives are called that because they operate on Newton's basic laws of motion. Pulse drives operate on a different principle, and while they can go many times the speed of sound, they can't go anywhere near the speed of light.

Total score for valid points: 0.5

 

 

  
real trekkie
Guest






PostPosted: Tue Jul 24, 2007 5:24 pm  Post subject:  uh huh... Reply with quoteBottom of PageBack to top

Funny post. Really. I enjoyed it. Don't know what Firelfy is but whatever...

We've seen and heard all this before, but we have big shoulders so we can take it. The only reason people make fun of Star Trek is that they're jealous they didn't think of it first!

Oh and by the way... Star Trek was the first original 'western in space'. It was often referred to by Gene Roddenbury as "Wagon Train" to the stars.

And it worked. And continues to work.... 40 years later.

Beam me up, Scotty... there's no intelligent life here!

 

 

  
diskincluded
Guest






PostPosted: Tue Jul 24, 2007 7:10 pm  Post subject:  Re: 10 things i hate about star trek Reply with quoteBottom of PageBack to top

trekkie wrote:
2. The Holodeck.
I mean, it's cool and all. But do you really believe that people would use it to re-create Sherlock Holmes mysteries and old-west saloons? Come on, we all know what the holodeck would be used for. And we also know what the worst job on the Enterprise would be: Having to squeegie the holodeck clean.


Actually some of the holodecks ARE used for that. I'm looking at you, Quark of Deep Space 9. With your holo-brothel.

...probably best not to ask how I know that... <.<

 

 

  
Ham Salad
Guest






PostPosted: Tue Jul 24, 2007 10:46 pm  Post subject:  Re: Worst things about star trek? Reply with quoteBottom of PageBack to top

Hagbard wrote:
Ham Salad wrote:
Well, the worst SF show on TV is firefly...and the fact it died after 6 episodes while trek has been ongoing since 1967 might clue you in a bit.
I have to believe that there are firefly fans just like I have to believe there are fans of lost in space...but m,y suspician is they both are riding the same short bus.

Now, the problem here is that you can't find just 10 things wrong with firefly...in fact, you can't find less than 10 things wrong with firefly per minute.

How about:

1. idiotic western in space.
It's been done befoire, and it sucked every time it was tried.


Don't really see how that supports your argument that Firefly itself is bad.


You don't see much. A show that gets after only 6 episodes is pretty much is being cancelled for being crap.

Score for valiid point: 100
Your score: 0



Hagbard wrote:


Quote:
2. George lucas called, he says your han solo ripoff is lame.


Yeah, and Han Solo was sooooo original. Didn't you hear about Philip Francis Nowlan's call to Lucas?



I heard about a lot of things...which are irrelevant. Again, firefly is obviously derivative...and doing it badly.

Star wars is a success. Firefly is a failure. If Lucas's character is derivative, at leas he apparently got it right.


Score for valiid point: 100

Your score: 0


Hagbard wrote:


Quote:
3. Reavers. right, insane people who can nonethelss fly spacecraft.
Riggghhhttt.


And Murdock from the A-team was an insane guy




Which is completely irrelevant. And meaningless. And, let's face it, pretty much nonsense on your part.

Is the A-team supposed to be science fiction? Was mad dog murdoch so insane he ate people and couldn't talk?


Really, you should stop posting before you humiliate yourself to death.




Score for valiid point: 100

Your score: 0

Quote:
This is almost like idiots using computers...

oh, wait: you do . never mind.


Hagbard wrote:


Oooh a lame joke.




No, a very telling one... and it applies to you too.


My score: 100
Your score: 0


Hagbard wrote:

Quote:
4. Guns that throw bullets far in the future.

Oh, sure, I believe they would still be using 200 year old weapons designs...look at all the f-18 pilots that wear a flintlock.

idiotic.


Well, if you knew anything about the universe of the series, you'd know that advanced weaponry exists.


I know that they are using 19th and 20th century firearms in 'the far future'. I know way too much about the absurd warped absurdity that passes for a premise of this ...I can't call it a show, this teleplay by a school for the retarded.


Idiotic, just like your attempts at justification.

My score: 100
Your score: 0

Quote:
5. Cornball corn pone accents.
The old west was 150 years ago, and it's just as likely that
in the future they would talk and dress like disco stu as a friggin' cowboy.



Hagbard wrote:


Although the accent thing comes down to a matter of opinion, I'll give you that one.


No, you'll give me every one. you're just not making good arguments, because I suspect you're pretty ignorant.


My score: 100
Your score: 0


Hagbard wrote:

Quote:
6. FTL travel or not? make up your tiny little minds.


Where do they ever go faster than light?


Well, for one thing , the mentions other 'star systems' inb the show...and the idea of how they got to thei one which apparntly has multiple inhabitable planets comes to mind.

Also the idiocy that somehow you could 'hide' with only 3 or 4 places you can breathe...

idiotic, just like the rest of the show: they imply FTL and lack thereof at the same time. i suspect that this probelm exists because thje idiots who wrote and produces this atrocity think a solar system is about the same size as the pacific ocean.



My score: 100
Your score: 0

YOU LOSE.

 

 

  
Ham Salad
Guest






PostPosted: Tue Jul 24, 2007 11:08 pm  Post subject:  Re: uh huh... Reply with quoteBottom of PageBack to top

real trekkie wrote:
Funny post. Really. I enjoyed it. Don't know what Firelfy is but whatever...

We've seen and heard all this before, but we have big shoulders so we can take it. The only reason people make fun of Star Trek is that they're jealous they didn't think of it first!

Oh and by the way... Star Trek was the first original 'western in space'. It was often referred to by Gene Roddenbury as "Wagon Train" to the stars.



No, actually it wasn't. Gene envisioned the show as more of a 'navy in space' concept. I suspect he ripped the idea off from FORBIDDEN PLANET, actually.

Yes, he did use the phrase 'wagon train to the stars' to try to sell the idea, because he realized he was pitching to people who weren't educated (or smart ) enough to understand it at all. Gene was in fact a world class BS slinger. Obviously.

It never was, nor can ever be considered to be a western in space...it has virtually no elements either dramatically or physically in common with a western (unlike that turd firefly).

Resetting one genre into another genre is a classic bad literary cliche'...
You can't turn a western into science fiction by making the horses into space ships, it doesn't work because it's still a western. If it's such a bad western that it can't work as a western, then how could anyone possibly think that disguising it as science fiction would make it any better?
That's the work of idiots who think that their audience is composed of morons who can't tell the difference..and sadly, it appears they were right; firefly fans ARE morons who can't tell the difference between good and bad.

 

 

  
Guest







PostPosted: Wed Jul 25, 2007 9:51 am  Post subject:  (No subject) Reply with quoteBottom of PageBack to top

Ha, you guys crack me up. Especially, the guy who claimed to "win" an argument on the interent. Good luck with that.

Btw, your first point about Firefly being a futuristic space western. That was the exact premise behind the original Star Trek.

Now, back to your regularly schedule flamewar.

 

 

  
Ham Salad
Guest






PostPosted: Wed Jul 25, 2007 10:17 am  Post subject:  (No subject) Reply with quoteBottom of PageBack to top

[quote="Anonymous"]Ha, you guys crack me up. Especially, the guy who claimed to "win" an argument on the interent.


You really need to become less stupid. So far, no one in fact has 'claimed they won' the arguement.

[quote="Anonymous"]
Good luck with that.

Good luck with ever having a life.

Anonymous wrote:


Btw, your first point about Firefly being a futuristic space western. That was the exact premise behind the original Star Trek..



Again, as I pointed out already, that is not in fact the case.
I realise you'e not familiar with the standards that in fact DEFINE what science fiction is, or what a WESTERNis, so you'll just have to take my word for it that yes, firefly is a cheesy western, and no, star trek is not.


You should really learn to read, and then perhaps reason.



Good luck with those grade school proficiency exams.

 

 

  
Guest







PostPosted: Wed Jul 25, 2007 11:49 am  Post subject:  (No subject) Reply with quoteBottom of PageBack to top

you guys are funny; Gilligan's Island was better the best and most innovative SF show anyway!!

 

 

  
jim
Administrator
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Age: 68
Joined: 10 Feb 2007
Posts: 94

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PostPosted: Wed Jul 25, 2007 12:49 pm  Post subject:  Dont forget to vote Reply with quoteBottom of PageBack to top

While your here, don't forget to beam over to this post and vote for your favorite all time Star Trek movie.

Beam me up Scotty

 

 

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Ham Salad
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PostPosted: Wed Jul 25, 2007 1:11 pm  Post subject:  (No subject) Reply with quoteBottom of PageBack to top

Anonymous wrote:
you guys are funny; Gilligan's Island was better the best and most innovative SF show anyway!!


Well, it was better science fiction than firefly, which sucks.

 

 

  
Guest







PostPosted: Wed Jul 25, 2007 3:21 pm  Post subject:  Re: 10 things i hate about star trek Reply with quoteBottom of PageBack to top

DekklinOfDeath wrote:
trekkie wrote:

3. Technobabble.
The other night, I couldn't get my car to start. I solved the problem by reversing the polarity of the car battery, and routing the power through my satellite dish. The resulting subspace plasma caused a rift in the space-time continuum, which created a quantum tunnelling effect that charged the protons in the engine core, thus starting my car. Child's play, really. As a happy side-effect, I also now get the Spice Channel for free.


I believe the proper term is Trek-nobabble (possibly without the hyphen).

You could have also fixed your car by using a Temporal Phase Shifted Modulating Inverse Tachyon Beam, while rerouting power through the main deflector dish.
No no no no no.
You need to start by bouncing a graviton particle beam off the main deflector dish. Don't you know anything? *laughs*
Seriously, for an ode to technobabble, take a listen to Voltaire's "USS-Make-crap-Up". It's brilliant.
=P

--Rigu

 

 

  
Guest







PostPosted: Wed Jul 25, 2007 3:58 pm  Post subject:  (No subject) Reply with quoteBottom of PageBack to top

Furthermore...
GET A GRIP, GUYS
They are TV SHOWS. And your fandom sucks.

I don't care what you're a fan of, whether it's Star Trek/Wars, Firefly, Harry Potter, Courage the Cowardly Dog, Friends, Superman, whatever... your fandom sucks. Most of the fans I see here fall into the category of POSSESSIVE FANBOYS AND FANGIRLS who think that Star Trek/Star Wars/Firefly is the best show ever, and refuse to concede that anything else has merit. Guys, I repeat: get a grip. It's the Internet. No one cares.

Also, as a Trekkie, I though that this post was HILARIOUS. =P In fact, I sent it to my Trekkie boyfriend, and we both laughed at it. (We also laughed at the irate fans, but I'm not gonna mention that.) =P

--Rigu


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Ham Salad
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PostPosted: Wed Jul 25, 2007 8:20 pm  Post subject:  (No subject) Reply with quoteBottom of PageBack to top

Anonymous wrote:
Furthermore...
GET A GRIP, GUYS
They are TV SHOWS. And your fandom sucks.

--Rigu


Well, your fandoml is a transvestite whore with AIDS.

Seriously, you really have a gift for using many words to say nothing.
You should just not post at all, and the result would be the same.

 

 

  
Guest







PostPosted: Wed Jul 25, 2007 9:07 pm  Post subject:  Re: Dont forget to vote Reply with quoteBottom of PageBack to top

jim wrote:
While your here, don't forget to beam over to this post and vote for your favorite all time Star Trek movie.

Beam me up Scotty


Actually, I think the last place I would want to be beamed is "up Scotty".

 

 

  
trekkie



Age: 31
Joined: 25 Jul 2007
Posts: 2

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PostPosted: Wed Jul 25, 2007 9:28 pm  Post subject:  (No subject) Reply with quoteBottom of PageBack to top

Check this out:

45 things that NEVER happened on Star Trek

 

 

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SamStone
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PostPosted: Fri Jul 27, 2007 5:54 pm  Post subject:  Intellectual Property Reply with quoteBottom of PageBack to top

Just so 'Trekkie' doesn't get away with it, I'd like to point out that this is not his work. It is copied verbatim from an article I wrote on Happyfunpundit.com in 2003.

Here's the original: 10 Things I Hate About Star Trek

 

 

  
Dan The Man
Guest






PostPosted: Fri Aug 24, 2007 2:51 pm  Post subject:  (No subject) Reply with quoteBottom of PageBack to top

Funny as heck (whoever wrote it).

And seriously, people who are taking this really seriously and having arguments about it need to lighten up. It's a joke.

 

 

  
Guest







PostPosted: Wed Aug 29, 2007 12:22 am  Post subject: Cool Ham Salad is a F**ktard Reply with quoteBottom of PageBack to top

Funny post.

And since I have some time and am bored, I'll spend a little time on Ham Salad because it really bugs me when people claim to be intelligent, but in fact are illiterate and unintelligent.

Misspellings:
"fandoml" instead of "fandom"
"arguement" instead of "argument"
"you'e" instead of "you're"
"valiid" instead of "valid"
"leas" instead of "least"
"the" instead of "they"
"inb" instead of "in"
"thei" instead of "the"
"apparntly" instead of "apparently"
"probelm" instead of "problem"
"thje" instead of "the"
"dramtic" instead of "dramatic"
"diffrnce" instead of "difference"
"nonethelss" instead of "nonetheless"

Poor diction/grammar/etc.:
"Your fandoml [sic] is a transvestite..." This is nonsensical.

"Seriously, you really have a gift for using many words to say nothing." People such as yourself feel the need to make a point stronger by using adverbs. In fact such use of adverbs adds no value to your sentences; it merely makes them longer. Kindly remove such poor use of adverbs from your rants if you wish to be taken seriously by intelligent people. To an educated reader, your egregious use of words like "actually," "really," "in fact," "virtually," etc. is akin to listening to a person playing the cello with a chainsaw.

"Good luck with ever having a life." Also nonsensical. He posted, therefore he is alive (or was at least of the time of posting).

"Again, as I pointed out already..." Redundant.

"...that yes [sic] firefly is a cheesy western, [sic] and no, Star Trek is not." Aside from being a poorly written sentence, you are not using your commas correctly, and even when you are using them, they are not parallel.

It should be: "...that, yes, Firefly is a cheesy western and, no, Star Trek is not."

"I've heard about..." It's "I've heard..."

There is no such thing as a "telling joke."

"you're just not making good arguments, because I suspect you're pretty ignorant." This has the opposite meaning from what you intended. If he's "pretty ignorant," how can he be "making good arguments"?

"i suspect that this probelm exists because thje idiots whowrote and produces this atrocity think a solar system is about the same size as the pacific ocean." Aside from the many spelling errors noted above, you have a problem with parallel structure again: It's "the idiots who wrote and produce..." not "the idiots who wrote and produces..."

"it's fans" instead of "its fans." Ouch. That's a really bad one.


Poor Logic Skills:
"Resetting one genre into another genre is a classic bad literary cliche'..."

That's not correct. Many skilled authors have successfully put one or more genres into situations where they are "not supposed to be." A very famous contemporary example is Haruki Murakami, who takes the shell (or commonly recognized qualities) of certain genres and mises them together to great effect. There are many, many examples of this done well, and not in a cliched manner, as you erroneously state.

Also incorrect is your underlying premise that others cannot a) fathom or b) enjoy things that are juxtaposed or which appear impossible. Simply because you have neither the acumen nor the imagination to enjoy something that appears at first glance to be in opposition to itself (by structure or by style), does not make your statement correct. I know you think it does, but it does not. A western can be a sci-fi and a tiger can be a lion (a liger). But it first requires imagination to make it so.

That whole paragraph is riddled with grammatical errors, by the way.

Your next mistake is the statement that because Firefly was cancelled due to it "sucking." Whether Firefly sucked or not is merely personal opinion. Most shows in the U.S. are cancelled for one reason: lack of viewers. Not enough viewers, not enough advertisers. Firefly was expensive to produce and had no established fan base as ST does. Not a good combination for a new show, and so it got killed. It didn't stop it from getting 6 Emmy nominations (and winning 3). Just because a show is cancelled does not mean it sucks. It just means it wasn't making enough almighty dollars.

ST, great a show as it is, also benefited from the huge interest in space and space travel in the 1960s. Sadly, this interest has waned a lot in the general public, to the point where NASA is constantly having its budget cut and threatened with obscurity or outright cancellation. Combined with a western, another flagging area of interest, and, well, the writing was probably on the wall.

Your argument is, aside from being infantile and communicated in a style reminiscent of a butcher cutting meat, simply fallacious.

"3. Reavers. right, insane people who can nonethelss fly spacecraft." There are many examples of insane people being able to carry out complicated functions in society. Have you not heard the name Charles Manson? If someone can convince a bunch of others to go on murder spree for no good reason, it's safe to say an insane person could fly a spaceship. Not all of them, but certainly the smart ones.

Closing:
I didn't write this to change you. Why I wrote it is so that every time you call someone stupid or an idiot, in the back of your head, you'll remember that, in fact, it is you that has the intellectual power of a lint ball, that it is actually YOU who is grossly unskilled and ungraceful when using language.

I won't be back here, so no point writing a reply. I'll just be in the back of your head reminding you how much of a f**ktard you are.

 

 

  
RProgrammer
Guest






PostPosted: Thu Nov 01, 2007 5:11 pm  Post subject:  Excellent Reply with quoteBottom of PageBack to top

Hilarious, especially the "chain of command". Also, I have never noticed what the lack of punctuation does to Scotty's cliché, very funny.

To the post before be: Brilliant, although his spelling errors were produced by clumsy fingers during an apace written article. Not to say that is excusable, but it is their blatant lack of revision which needs to be criticized.


Also, many of you note the failure of Firefly; but failure in a capitalistic network is not necessarily indicative of poor quality. Do you really think Fox is the quintessential judge of a science fiction series?

 

 

  
Guest
Guest






PostPosted: Tue May 12, 2009 5:05 pm  Post subject:  Freaks Reply with quoteBottom of PageBack to top

Ugghhh... Loser Freaks!!! EEEEEWWWW! You guys were probably bullied in school, you deserve it, freaks... Go screw yourselves...

 

 

  
feergoortens
Guest






PostPosted: Mon Apr 26, 2010 4:14 am  Post subject:  South Africa Steps Up Efforts Against AIDS Reply with quoteBottom of PageBack to top

SOVANE, South Africa — South Africa, trying to overcome years of denial and delay in confronting its monumental AIDS crisis, is now in the midst of a feverish buildup of testing, treatment and prevention that United Nations officials say is the largest and fastest expansion of AIDS services ever attempted by any nation.

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Archo




Age: 27
Joined: 02 Sep 2011
Posts: 1

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PostPosted: Fri Sep 02, 2011 5:45 am  Post subject:  (No subject) Reply with quoteBottom of PageBack to top

I've always loved science fiction novels and decent science fiction movies like "District 9", but science fiction series like Star Trek have left me cold. The last series were loathesome. Nothing but deus ex machina, no character development, no interesting stories... It stank on ice.

 

 



Last edited by Archo on Wed Jun 20, 2012 12:34 am; edited 5 times in total

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nike2323



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PostPosted: Thu Feb 23, 2012 4:01 am  Post subject:  (No subject) Reply with quoteBottom of PageBack to top

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