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Cheeky
Guest
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My professional disclaimer:
I love my job. I really do. I work at the front desk of a hotel. Every day presents a new challenge, the majority of our guests are great people with whom I love speaking...and the very best part of all is that I am leaving this job in August to begin grad school.....however.....
The following is a list of things that PISS ME OFF: (its long-but if you travel often, read it)
1) Guests who do not listen. Look sir/ma'am: I just went over every single detail regarding your stay. Where to park, breakfast schedule, amenities and how to reach me if you should need further assistance. Chances are, I've already gone over my little crap speech 400 times by the time you even thought about checking in. So pretty frigging please- DO NOT- tune me out and then ask, "Where can I park?" It makes my eye twitch.....but I will always tell you again. (assholes)
2) I wish I could promise that the magnetic strip on your key will work %100 of the time.....but I cannot. Its just not within my power. So please don't come down to the front desk and yell at me. Contrary to your belief- I am not trying to ruin your day. I will always make you a new key so that you may be on your merry way. Besides- we have an elevator you lazy screw. Its not like you had to go on a jungle safari to make your way to the lobby. 
3) I love a good PORNO- don't you? After a hard day of work nothing is better than whacking off to some bleach blond chick licking her own nipples. I agree. (and I'm a chick) HOWEVER- please understand that this service will show up on your receipt. Also- please understand that some of the billing systems in hotels don't have the capability to remove said ordered service. You can change your method of payment so that it will not appear on your company/family/wife's/hooker's credit card- but it will ALWAYS be on the receipt. It won't say PORNO!! or THIS GUYS WATCHED A DIRTY MOVIE!!! It will read: "service"
I am not lying to you- I promise. I wish I could make it disappear, but I cannot. It just doesn't work that way. SO PLEASE DO NOT frigging YELL AT ME, CALL ME STUPID, BELITTLE MY EXISTENCE OR BLAME ME FOR YOUR DREADFUL MANAGER THAT WILL SCRUTINIZE YOU FOR YOUR MOVIE VIEWING HABITS DESPITE THE FACT THAT YOU PAID FOR IT YOURSELF!!! If it was that serious- you should have asked the clerk at the desk prior to ordering your film. Besides- when you treat me like a dog I'm gonna be a bitch. I go to the back and look up what porn you watched and make fun of you behind your back.
4) Lost & Found items: Look asshole, its not my fault you left your oh so special $400 pair of jeans in your room last week. So don't call me and bitch me out or get cranky with me over it. If it meant that much to you- wouldn't you have left it in the first place. I will always take down your info, send it to the housekeeping manager and if its found- I will ship it to you. Its no problem. Its what I am here for. Just don't be a dick about it. An error on your part- does not constitute an emergency on my part.
5) Times are a changin'. The economy is wonky- and our room rates will in fact fluctuate based on operating costs and occupancy. Its the law of the land folks. I understand sir, that you stayed with us last year and your room rate was $, however since you called your reservation in 5 minutes before you were to arrive, and we only had 2 rooms left to sell in the entire joint, your rate is going to be higher. Its nothing personal- and its not my choice. Some suit and tie is sitting in an office somewhere getting out the lube so that he may ass screw you....not me. SUPPLY AND DEMAND PEOPLE!!!! Besides, we have you initial the rate when you check-in so it shouldn't be a surprise in the morning. So please do not come to me and give me an attitude about it. You wouldn't go to the grocery store for a gallon of milk then take it to the cashier and say, "Well, last week I only paid $2.35 for a gallon of milk....so.....that's all I am going to pay today."
6) If you want your prostitute to have a key to your room- give her one or put her name on the reservation so that I may give her one. I can take her name off in the morning if you'd like- that way nobody will know your little secret. But please, oh please, don't have your hooker come to the desk and demand a key to your room. I cannot give her one unless you personally told me to. Its against policy. Your hooker will most likely be cracked out and cause a scene (which by the way- is HILARIOUS) and then I have to call our little cop friend to have her removed. (which is also pretty frigging funny) but the cop car sometimes causes distress among our other guests. And I don't like that. I want them to relax and enjoy staying with us just as I want the same for you. Seriously.
The moral of the story- don't yell at the front desk clerk and don't be stupid. I want to make your stay as enjoyable as possible and I want you to come back. And here is a secret: I work harder and go the extra mile for guests who are kind, patient in the face of adversity, and respect my position......which means sometimes I "accidentally" upgrade them to a suite at no extra cost, adjust the long distance off of their bill once in a while, remember their names, let them watch TV in the board room if the lobby is too full, I even let a guest feel me up once! (ok- that last one was a joke)
Thanks for staying & do come again!
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mongo
Guest
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While I sympathize with your comments I can't help feeling you've missed the point, especially with your opening comment. Customer service is about allowing for the fact that stuff you do 400 times a day the customer may only do once a year.
It is totally unreasonable to expect a customer to follow every one of a string of comments that you rattle off from memory at high speed. Put yourself in the customer's shoes and see it from his or her perspective and then you might get it a bit better.
Having said that there is no excuse for rudeness from customers. It's just plain stupid to needlessly antagonize someone from whom you are seeking help.
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DAdvocate
Age: 31
Joined: 25 Jul 2007
Posts: 2
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| Mongo, you have missed the EVEN BIGGER point. The less someone makes, the better you have to treat them. Your lawyer, who you pay $500 an hour? He doesn't give a good goddamn how you talk to him. Just pay him. This girl at the front desk, making $10 an hour? If you're not nice to her, she will find a way to jack you up. Same for the woman at the DMV or your kids' teacher.
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_________________
The Spartans ask not how many, but where they are. -Agis II
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HotelChick
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| I can't agree with you more, every word is true and hilarious. I'd like to add that if the breakfast area is full, and we are trying to restock don't get pissy because someone else just grabbed the last donut. That is the next one I'm going to refill. Give me one bloody second. Great post!
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another hotel chick
Guest
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Hillarious post!! I'd like to add to it, the guests who ask about our pet policy. . ."Sorry, we don't accept pets." What part of this is so hard to understand??? 99% of the time when I (or my coworkers) say this, I get "But he's only a small dog." A small dog is still a dog!
And how about the parents who think that we're supposed to babysit their brats? This is not the day and age to be letting your 'precious angels' run around the hotel unsupervised, so put down your drink and reign in your brats before we sell them to the circus!!!!
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Devi
Guest
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I have been a hotel Night Auditor on and off for 10 years now, all the while going to school. Yea I can't decide what I want to do with my life.
Anyway, I have to add this. People treat us hotel clerks worse than anyone else they would ever dare.
I am good at my job. I am efficient, knowledgeable, and friendly. BUT I have a hard time when people are not only rude but cruel. I WILL MAKE YOUR STAY UNPLEASENT. I have been doing this for 10 years and I have figured many ways to get back at people who say things like, “Your job will be mine!” and, “Are you stupid or something?” In fact asshole I’m not.
I have three college degrees working on my University Bachelors in Biology, and I don’t need you to talk to me like this because some housekeeper forgot to clean your room today, or perhaps you left your do not disturb sign out.
I wish there was a way to show people themselves. Put a mirror in front of them so they can see what complete and utter tools they are. Desk clerks are people too, seriously, as funny as that sounds it’s true. Sad thing is we should not even need to say it.
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Hotel Guy
Guest
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Kelsea Jo
Guest
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I agree with everything every single desk clerk on here has said. We take a lot of crap from alot of people, I've found if ANYTHING goes wrong its OUR fault (I mean, someone called in the other day complaining that their GPS wasn't working- like, I'm sorry about that, but how exactly am I responsable? Please tell because I have no frigging clue).
To add another point to the list- it's fricking irritating when guests are complaining about paying taxes. Like, geez people, the only thing we're all guarenteed in life is death and taxes. That's a fricking given. If you don't like it, take it up with the fricking goverment. I have no control over taxes, so don't yell at us because you have to pay them. I do too, for goodness sake.
The article hotel guy posted- the one with the customers responding- really made me sick. I mean, treat others the way you want to be treated. I would never treat ANYONE the way some customers have treated me as a clerk. I've got something called a conscious (ever heard of it?), and like to give people the respect they deserve. That asshole was complaining that we should treat guests like royalty no matter what- but there's nothing wrong with that guest treating us nicely in return. Having manners won't kill you. Many of those replies were very narrow-minded.
Bottom line, I'll always have a smile on my face when I'm serving you, but if you treat me like crap for the sake of it- you can bet your ass I'll be giving you the bird as you walk away.
Eh, I guess I just had a bad day, heh.
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Guest
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You guys are so right! I'm the AGM at a hotel and every day I pray that I have the strength to deal with the stupid people I know I am going to have to deal with!
And when you have your DO NOT DISTURB sign up, dont yell at us because we didn't disturb you, demand full service at 7pm, and then lie about having it up all day. We know you had it on your door! Come on!
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AK Clerk
Guest
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Thank you, everyone, for helping me to feel that I'm not alone in this. Like all of the other posters here, I strive to give every single guest the friendliest and most competent service possible but I cannot see why I should be held responsible for the guest's stupidity.
My favorite recent example happened to me as I was working the late shift. The property was booked at 100% and I checked all of the incoming reservations at the beginning of my shift to make sure that any requests from the guests would be fulfilled (e.g. connecting rooms, non-smoking, etc.). We have only two smoking rooms on the property and it just so happened that no one requested non-smoking rooms. Therefore, it was a crapshoot--the first people to arrive would have the choice of smoking or non, and the last people to show up would lose their choice.
Naturally, all of the early guests wanted non-smoking. Two reservations left to check in and both were the smoking rooms. Guess what? One of the reservations had an asthmatic woman and the other was for a guy that stopped smoking four months ago. They were out of luck and had to go up the street to another hotel.
If there are any regular travelers reading this, please know that our powers as Hotel Desk Clerks do not include psychic ability. We cannot touch your name on the computer screen and discern if you have special needs. You need to tell us when you make your reservation!!
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almagitana
Guest
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oh yes i hear ur pain, somebody just threw the house phone at me bc he wanted a key to a room that wasnt even in his name, hello, im doing this for ur own safety and the room was in a womans name...dont ask for a key to a room if u dont have an ID and dont yell at the clerk for being responsible and doing their job... dont ask me: is this where i come in? after u have already checked in and i got done telling u where everything is....
Bitch**SlaPP sent to: almagitana From almagitana
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alenachka
Guest
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Bitch**SlaPP sent to: alenachka From alenachka
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makssemenovs
Guest
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Bitch**SlaPP sent to: makssemenovs From makssemenovs
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frontdeskgirl
Guest
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i dont think anyone could ever capture how i feel better than this. tonight a firealarm in the hotel went off, there was no fire, just a cable broke or something. did i pull the fire alarm? did i personally set off the alarms? NO! so why are you yelling at me?! one lady was standing up at the front desk complaining for about 10 minutes straight.. and then another guest alked through the door to checkin. the first thing that lady says is you dont wanna stay here, there have been so many problems. i could feel my face getting red with anger at this woman!! a perfectly fine guests stay is ruined by your selfishness.
thankyou for this post. im glad im not the only one!!
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Guest
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